Avoiding Christmas
by Yulliah
Summary: Edward hates everything Christmas vehemently. Actually, he hates every holiday, but this one is especially hard to avoid. It doesn't really help that Christmas decorations and complete strangers invaded his December hideout this year. This might just prove to be the worst Christmas ever, or will it? Winning story for the SWW Christmas In My Hometown Contest!
1. Avoiding Christmas

**I am honored that this story won first place in the SWW Christmas In My Hometown Contest! Thank you so so much!**

**My thanks goes out as well to my AWESOME prereader KGQ and the amazing Deßra who betaed this story for me!**

**SWW Christmas In My Hometown Competition.**  
**Title: Avoiding Christmas**  
**Penname: YulliahPairing: Edward/Jasper**  
**Rating: NC-17**  
**Word Count: 7815**  
**Summary: Edward hates everything Christmas vehemently. Actually, he hates every holiday, but this one is especially hard to avoid. It doesn't really help that Christmas decorations and complete strangers invaded his December hideout this year. This might just prove to be the worst Christmas ever, or will it?**  
**Disclaimer: I really REALLY don't own Twilight.**

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**Christmas Eve 2010**

_Oh come on!_ I thought as I walked into Extase. This was my one place to go to, every single year. The one place where I could avoid all of it. The one place in this entire God forsaken, Pagan town, where you could enjoy a beer in quiet solitude during these three days of hell, and the weeks leading up to it.

I sat down at the bar, turning my back to the colorfully lit up atrocity in the corner. I groaned loudly at James' weakness. I knew exactly who was to blame for this. I knew exactly how this denotation of fraudulent joy and celebration came to spoil my December sanctuary.

"What's up, Ed? What's got you moaning and groaning on this fine winter's day? Anyone under there I don't know about?" James asked as he reached for my favorite poison.

I threw him a hard stare.

He poured me a glass of Glenmorangie and sat it down in front of me. "Geeze! What's gotten your boxers in a twist?" he asked, screwing the lid back on, but leaving it within reach.

I shook my head. He knew full well what it was. We'd been through this year after year, for about six years now, though both for very different reasons. James had been the ever single guy, hopeless romantic and holiday-depressed one. I was -and still am- the 'Cold-hearted bastard who refuses to love their loved ones, the ultimate Scrooge', according to him; while, in fact, I detested the way holidays required people to be kind and loving in the first place. Hell, I love my loved ones, and I damned well show them I do. It's just that I do it every _other _day of the year.

I wasn't sitting at some fancy schmancy dinner table, laughing at my deadbeat father and kissing my mother's frozen cheek. Besides that, the commercialism that took over every single holiday had the bile rising in my throat. Happy, peppy Santas all over the place, in every fucking direction you looked. Since people started to hand out presents at Christmas as well, I was done with it.

I used to love St. Nicholas as a kid. I'd stand in the street with the other kids, waiting anxiously for the parade of Black Peter and St. Nicholas on his white horse Amerigo to pass, getting candy thrown at me and wishing I'd get the presents I'd asked for. Coming down the stairs December 6th, I'd eye the beautifully wrapped gifts in the fireplace. That was now ruined. Kids rarely celebrated St. Nicholas anymore. It was Santa this and Santa that. _Stupid fat man with his annoying little dwarfs._ Oh, excuse me, elves!

Happiness was the other reason I hated Christmas with a vengeance. During the second half of December, you weren't allowed to even look remotely depressed. _"Why so sad? It's Christmas!" _Well fuck Christmas! I wasn't having it!

I pointed my thumb over my shoulder at the monstrous tree behind me and furrowed my brow. "Why, James?" I grumbled. "How could you? How could you desert your brother in arms?"

James chuckled and shrugged. "You know Victoria; she's got me whipped, man!"

"I need a piss. Please tell me that is the only decoration in this place?" I demanded with a hopeful look.

He raised his hands up in defense. "It is! Don't worry! It really is!" he said.

As I walked to the hallway between the dance floor and the bar, where the toilets were, James turned up the volume of the music that was playing. "Fucker! Turn that off!" I yelled over my shoulder when the heavy metal version of 'White Christmas' droned through the speakers. James responded with an outburst of laughter, and I gritted my teeth. I'd repay the fucker, I swore I would!

When I got back to the bar, a guy was sitting on the stool next to the one I'd been sitting on. He was leaning heavily on the surface, clutching a bottle of Jupiler like it was his only hope. Adding circumstances in my head, I came to a few possible solutions. I sighed as I sat down next to him, and raised my glass to my mouth. I finished the drink in one go, slamming the glass back on the counter. Before I could even ask James for a refill, he was pouring the golden liquid over a handful of ice cubes.

I took another gulp before I turned to the guy next to me. He had dark, curly hair that just reached his sharp cheekbones. His body was lean, but muscular. The way his biceps flexed under the rolled up sleeves of his dress shirt had me wondering if he was strong as well. He wasn't dressed for a place like this. Fuck, this wasn't a heavy metal bar or anything, but the usual customers had at least a couple of piercings, and the place was a gallery of the best tattoos in town.

How on earth a preppy fraternity guy like him wound up in a bar like this was beyond me. He was probably one of those 'Olof' guys that studied at the local university. He certainly looked young enough, and the hairdo was a dead giveaway.

"So, broke up with your girlfriend? A fight with the parents?" I asked, and his eyes shot up to meet mine in confusion. Bright blue eyes, though they were missing the light that would make them shine.

"Huh?" he voiced in reply. _Great, stuck at the bar with a 'very' loquacious frat boy. How the joys of the world keep multiplying._

"The thing that happened to make you look like you want to drown yourself in beer," I clarified. I didn't know why I was even talking to the guy. Other than the fact that he was kind of hot, the chance of him even being interested was slight to none. And _I _wasn't even interested. Frat boys were not part of my repertoire.

Hell, guys from around here weren't even in my repertoire. Tilburg was a queen's town. There were three gay bars, one of which was primarily for lesbians, and two were centered around the gay men that embraced their 'flame'. The bar we were at now was not one of them. Just to be clear, I had nothing against flamboyant guys, I just wasn't attracted to them.

No, every other week, I would drive to a city like Rotterdam or Utrecht and visit a club there. The chance of meeting a great guy around here was small. The great thing about an open society was that we didn't get harassed or beaten up for being gay. The bad thing was, that because it was hardly ever an issue, the topic of sexuality didn't come up much in conversation. And it wasn't really a problem, unless you wanted to fuck a guy five ways till Sunday.

The guy next to me scowled at me for a second before he turned back to his beer. I wouldn't have even noticed the soft "Nope" if I hadn't seen his mouth move as he said it.

I turned back to my whiskey as well, and muttered an annoyed; "Well excuuuuse me."

A new song started, and I immediately recognized Radiohead's version of 'Winter Wonderland'.

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" I yelled, and got up from my stool. I got behind the bar and made my way to the stereo installation. James thought I was about to pound on him, standing between me and the source of the wretched holiday music. He backed up a couple of paces, but made no attempt to stop me.

I pulled 'Angel Dust' by Faith No More from the shelf and slid the CD into the player. I quickly skipped to the 4th track and turned the volume up. Closing my eyes for a second, enjoying the smooth intro, I heard someone chuckle.

I took a look over my shoulder and saw frat boy move to the music, tapping his finger against the polished wood of the bar with his eyes closed. _Well, what do you know? Frat boy knows his music! Maybe he did come to the right place!_

I got back to my stool in amusement, and made sure to brush my elbow against his arm as I sat down. I was watching James clean the counter behind the bar when I felt the boy's eyes on me. I glanced back at him from the corner of my eye and noticed a slight smile on his lips.

"Thanks for that," he said. His Dutch seemed very good, but the roundness of his vowels gave away his foreign origin. _Fuck me! Exchange student frat boy! _"If I hear one more Christmas song, I'm going to scream!" Homesickness, that must be it. He probably had a family somewhere, celebrating the season without him. From the sound of it, I could swear America.

"American?" I asked, just to be sure.

He cocked an eyebrow, and I was sure he wasn't going to answer me. "Yes, actually," he said, smiling. He had sexy fucking dimples, and my body was already starting to show interest.

"What brought you to our cold and wet little country?" The legal drinking age?" I mocked him. There was no way I was going to allow myself to start lusting over some twenty-year-old straight guy. Offense was the best defense.

He chuckled and played with the label on his beer bottle. "No, not the legal drinking age. I've lived here for a while now, since my parents moved here when I was eleven."

I shrugged, feigning disinterest, and took another swig of whiskey. "James!" I called, making my friend turn around. "We _are _still going to the anti-Christmas party at 013, right?" Anti-Christmas was a heavy metal night on the second day of Christmas, perfect for people like me, previously _us_.

James looked back at me, apology written in his eyes. _No! Fuck no! You can't bail on me, man!_

"I'm sorry, Ed, I have to go to Christmas dinner with Victoria's parents."

_Well, fuck me._

"You don't like Christmas?" frat boy asked in a surprised tone. I just glared at him, not answering. "I mean, this year it has no worth for me, but normally-" He sighed and took a gulp of beer. "I love it, the whole celebration of the birth of Christ thing. I'm not Christian, but I kind of like the magic of it."

I huffed and shook my head. "You know that Christ wasn't even born in December, right?" The guy furrowed his brow, and was ready to retort, but I caught him off. "In Luke 2:8, it says that at the time Christ was born, shepherds were abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night."

The boy raised his eyebrow in question, so I went on. He clearly didn't see the problem in that. "Well, this couldn't have happened in December in Judaea. Shepherds always brought their flocks from the mountains and fields and confined them before the middle of October. It would be too cold and wet after that to leave them out."

I took another mouthful of whiskey and went on. "Around the time we celebrate Christmas, the Pagans used to celebrate the shortest day of the year and the coming of the 'new sun'. The whole adaptation of Christmas was no more than a way of the Christians to say, _'If you can't beat them, join them!' _Nothing magical about that!"

"Aren't you the skeptic!" frat boy said. He was tracing his eyes down my body, and the way his eyes seemed to measure me out made me feel naked under his gaze. I could clearly feel my dick twitch in my jeans when his tongue came out and skidded over his bottom lip, followed by a set of white teeth. He bit his lip a while longer until he let go, making the taut white flesh return to its original pink color.

I managed to stop the groan rising in my chest, but had to look away in order to get my mind to abandon the lust-filled fantasies it was coming up with. Particularly the ones that starred those lips wrapped around my cock.

I cleared my throat before addressing him again. "If you want to call it skeptical, go right ahead. I prefer realistic, or practical."

James chuckled, and reached out to hit the back of my head. I pulled away in time, making him only hit the air between us. "Don't sweat it, Jasper. Ed here is the most skeptical person I've ever met. But he's a good guy, _most _of the time."

What the fuck was that supposed to mean? Most of the time. What the hell was he implying? I threw him a hard stare, and only then realized that James called the guy 'Jasper', like he knew him. I looked at him questioningly, and he mouthed something in answer. I thought he said 'Aro's ex', but I must have been mistaken. Aro was the 37-year-old owner of the strip joint around the corner. I heard he recently got divorced his ex, because the other guy found out he had a thing for 'young boys', and that was the reason for his solo trips to Thailand each year.

This actually surprised me. Well, not the trips to Thailand, I mean, no one condoned the guy's preference, and I certainly went out of my way to avoid the fucker. No, what surprised me, was that his ex hadn't known about it. Seriously, this was the worst kept secret in Tilburg. _Everyone _knew.

But as far as my information went, Aro's ex-husband was in his early thirties, and this guy was still wet behind his ears.

"Well, James, it shouldn't surprise me to find an atheist in this place. It isn't really inviting to nice churchgoing Catholics, now is it?" Jasper said as he winked at me.

"Hey!" I cried out. "I'm not atheistic, I'm agnostic. There's a difference!"

"Sure, sure!" Jasper answered, making me scowl again. "It all amounts to the same thing. You don't believe in God."

"I don't believe that the existence of a God can't be proven, but neither can the non-existence," I explained. "If there _is _a God, or any other supernatural entity, I choose not to lay my trust in him or her."

"Well, I don't believe there's a God, but I still enjoy the Christian holidays," Jasper said, turning back to his beer.

"Then you, my friend, are the atheist," I said. "And a hypocrite."

I turned to James, who was rummaging through a stack of CDs. "Hey, put some Placebo on, will ya?" I called out to him. He looked up at me with a smirk, the CD already in his hand. "Great minds," I laughed, and finished the second glass of whiskey of the day. When I placed it back on the bar, James gestured me to fill it up myself, and I reached for the bottle.

"A hypocrite, eh?" Jasper asked, a gleam sparkling in his eyes. He was clearly amused by my earlier statement. _Fucking frat boy can't take a hint._

"Look, kid. Don't you have some curfew or something?" I asked, annoyed. Really, all I wanted tonight was ignore the happy holiday spirit and have a few laughs with my best friend. A raging hard on and the frustrating wank I'd need afterwards were not part of that plan.

Jasper started laughing. Tears sprang from his eyes and he almost toppled off his stool as he doubled up. "Kid?" he asked between breaths. "God, that's so funny! Mostly because I would think that _I'm _the one that has a few years on _you_!"

I frowned, and leaned my elbow against the bar as I turned towards him. "Just for argument's sake, how old _are _you?" I asked. I threw him another scrutinizing once over, and was met by a glorified smirk when I reached his face again.

"I'm 31," he said. "You?"

"Thirty-one, my ass," I replied. I could give him 25, maybe, but the fucker was in no way older than me.

"I take it you haven't reached the magnificent thirties yet?" he asked.

I grunted, still unbelieving of his stated age.

"Ed here just turned twenty-eight," James answered him, and smiled evilly at me. "Thinks he's all mature now."

"Fuck you!" I grumbled, and once again raised the glass to my lips.

"No thanks, I'm more of a fucker than a fuckee. Besides, I don't think Vicky would appreciate extracurricular activities."

"Oh, ha ha!" I said sarcastically. There's no way on earth I'd ever fuck that hairy little ass of his. Not my type! Jasper, however, was quickly turning into my type. And if he really was older than he looked, I was certainly interested in finding out if the feeling was mutual.

"No, but really," I said, facing him. "How old are you?"

"No, but really, I'm thirty-one," he answered cockily.

"Fine!" I snapped at him. "If you're not going to tell me, that's just fine."

"Edward, stop acting like a stupid brat! The guy is telling the truth, he's thirty-one. Need him to show you his passport?" James said in his little 'Edward is being an ass' tone. "So, Jasper, have you found a place to live yet? Vicky's sister is trying to sell her house, and it's a really nice place.

"Can you mail me the details? I'm still in the apartment, as Aro is-" he stopped short and shivered visibly.

He _was _Aro's ex, so gay, right? And we all know where Aro was right now, and what the fuck he was doing. Shit! That must be one shitty way to spend Christmas for Jasper. But if he'd let me, I could sure make it a pleasurable experience. I grinned at the thought and gave my slashy mind full rein again.

I was just about to offer him a drink and turn my charm on him when he stood up and put a five Euro note on the bar. "Well, it was nice meeting you, Edward," he said, and winked. Then he turned to my friend. "Thanks for the hospitality, James. I'm gonna head off and turn in early."

_Leave? No! What? _"You sure you don't want to stick around for another beer? Or some more company?" I asked. I tried to lay the suggestion on strong and let my eyes wander over his body again.

He swallowed hard and shook his head. "As much as I would love to lose myself in some company, I don't think that would be a good idea for me right now." He turned around and walked out the door before I could respond.

"Seriously, Edward?" James snapped as soon as the door closed and I got up to follow Jasper. I gave him my best innocent 'What?' look, but he didn't buy it. "His fucking divorce was just finalized, and Aro is doing _exactly _what it is that broke them up. But you don't give a shit! You just want to bury yourself up his ass so deep that you'll forget your miserable life for a couple of seconds! No! There's no way I'm going to let you! So sit the fuck down and leave! Jasper! Alone!

I scowled at him, but did what he told me anyway. I knew he was right; I wasn't remotely interested in having a relationship. Especially not with a guy that still had feelings for someone else. The drama of being the rebound was not my thing, so instead of following Jasper and trying to persuade him to change his mind, I started drinking myself into a stupor. _Fuck Christmas!_

**Christmas Eve 2011**

I rummaged through my closet, trying to find anything that didn't remind me of that fucktard. Fucking Riley! Seriously, I didn't know why I ever fell for that crap! I wasn't really sad that my nine-month relationship had finally hit the rocks, but I _was _pissed off that I had to catch him cheating in my house. _My _house, for fuck's sake. I come home from the worst night at the hospital _ever,_ and I find him sprawled over the kitchen table, some stupid twink pounding him like a lunatic. Bareback!

That's not even what pissed me off the most. The fucking idiot! I knew it was a bad idea to have sex with him without a condom the first time he brought it up. I was so fucking happy I had refused him on that.

Trying to force all thoughts of Riley to the back of my mind, I pulled a black long sleeved T-shirt over my head and smiled. This was actually the same shirt I'd worn the year before. At the same place I was going to be tonight, Extase. This year, however, would be totally different. It would be James, me, Victoria, Seth and his wife Leah. We would have a few drinks, a nice dinner and a lot of fun. The bar would be closed for the evening, though no one ever came in on Christmas Eve anyway.

I wasn't entirely happy with our friends turning up for our holiday-free evening, but James assured me it wasn't a Christmas dinner. We'd have fun if we felt like it, no strings attached. I thought it was a crock of shit, and thought about just staying home, but for some reason he really wanted me to be there.

I couldn't help myself from wandering back to last year and Jasper. Fuck! I thought he was attractive back then, but over the last couple of months, I think I actually fell for him. The first time I had seen him after that night was at James and Victoria's wedding.

_He'd been tanned all over, and looked like a California surfer boy. I had just started getting serious with Riley, and didn't think it appropriate to go and talk to him._

_He'd come to find me when I was at the bar though, and we had a really good conversation about the value of marriage. For some reason, we really clicked, even though we had such different views on life in general. When I asked why he hadn't been back to Extase, he told me he had gone to Australia for a year, and only came back for the wedding._

_That's when Riley came back from the buffet and threw his arm around my waist, introducing himself. I could see Jasper's face fall, and it really bothered me. Though at the time I didn't realise why._

_The second time was at Extase. I was on the dance floor, dancing with my friend Bella, when a pair of hands grabbed my hips. This wouldn't be the first time that someone got up close and personal, but it was the first time the hands belonged to a guy. Well, apart from Riley's hands, but these were definitely not his._

_When I turned around, a pair of smirking blue eyes looked back at me and he winked. "Did ya miss me?" he asked, trailing his gaze down my body and back up again. I was kind of shocked to see him, as he was supposed to be on the other side of the world, but he burst out into a fit of laughter at the sight of my gawking face, and I couldn't help but join him._

_We spent the night talking at the bar, while James threw me questioning glances every now and then. I ignored it. Yes, I was still with Riley -telling Jasper that had made his face fall again- but this guy had a pull on me that I couldn't deny. It was after that night that I realised that I really liked him, and wasn't just attracted to him._

_The third and last time I saw him was on my birthday. He just showed up at the surprise party James threw me. I don't know why my best friend even bothered, because I never cared for celebrating my birthday. I was sure he just wanted to throw a party, and used this as a reason to do so._

_Riley was once again drunk to a point where it was embarrassing, when the door opened and Jasper hesitantly walked in. It was like the hairs on the back of my neck rose in anxious anticipation, though I was fairly sure it was just the cold draft from outside._

_He came right up to me and handed me a present. No one at the party had given me a present, seeing they all knew how much I hated forced tokens of appreciation, so for a moment I just glared at him._

"_I know you don't like birthday presents, but this isn't really one. I got you this a couple of months back, the birthday is just a ruse. I didn't think it appropriate for a guy to give a practical stranger a random gift," he said quietly and quickly. I narrowed my eyes at him for a second, not quite certain what to make of this, but decided to think about that later and just open the gift. _

_Inside was a leather necklace that held a round piece of tourmaline, encasing a smaller core of sodalite. Well, that was what it said on the adjoining card. They were the brightest shades of green and blue I had ever seen. The rich blue actually reminded me of Jasper's eyes._

"_I don't know, it's lame, but the green reminded me of your eyes," he said, and I raised my head to look at him. I took a step towards him and flung my arms around his shoulders, pulling him into a tight hug. This was the only way I could keep the tears from my eyes._

"_It's not lame, it's perfect," I whispered in his ear. "Thank you." _

_When I pulled away and he smiled broadly at me, like I had given 'him' a present, I knew I had fallen for him._

As I watched myself in the mirror, I noticed I had been touching the stones around my neck. Riley hadn't liked me wearing the necklace, and me being the good boyfriend, I hadn't. But since we'd broken up, it had been around my neck 24/7. I know, I know, it was mushy and wildly uncharacteristic, but with it, I felt closer to him somehow.

With a sigh, I concluded I was ready for the not-a-Christmas-party, and headed for the door, grabbing my keys from the kitchen counter. I took my bike from the shed and cycled the short distance to the bar. When I chained my bike to a lamppost, music was already escaping outside and through the windows I could see Leah rubbing her hands over Victoria's very pregnant belly. It made me smile and think about my own wishes to someday have a family of my own. James was a damned lucky man.

I opened the door and smiled. Victoria and Leah immediately pulled me into a warm hug, and James slapped my back as I shook Seth's hand. "Sit! Sit!" James yelled. "We're all here, and the starters won't eat themselves!"

I threw my jacket over a chair in the corner and sat down at the same time everyone else did. Wait! "James?" I asked. He looked up at me with a fake innocent smile. "Why is the table set for six?"

"Oh, didn't I tell you?" he replied. The smirk dominating his face told me he clearly knew he didn't. "Jasper is back from Australia, and he didn't have anywhere to go for Chr-"

Victoria elbowed him forcibly in his ribs, and the word I knew he was going to say disappeared in a huff of breath. He coughed and grabbed his side before turning back to me. "Jasper didn't have anywhere to go on this fine, normal, totally not special Saturday evening."

"So, where is he?" I asked in a casual tone that was contradicting the fluttery excitement I felt in my heart.

"Adding the finishing touches to our dinner, obviously," he answered. This had me confused, why on earth would he be in the kitchen at James' party? My friend sighed and shook his head. "Really, Edward, you don't even know the man's a chef?"

His comment made me blush. For all the hours Jasper and I had spent talking, the futile details of our careers had never once been a topic. I didn't think that he knew I was a doctor either.

"You know what? Why don't you go and give him a hand!" James suggested, and I narrowed my eyes at him. He was being so overly obvious that I couldn't ignore his meddling. Still, I got up and made my way to the kitchen. In truth, I was grateful for his meddling, and couldn't really wait to see that dimpled smile.

He was bent over the counter, seemingly concentrating on some plates as I walked in. I didn't interrupt him, mostly because the sight of his jean-clad ass took my breath away.

"So, who's the hypocrite now?" he asked as he straightened and turned towards me. I wondered if he even knew it was me in the first place.

"Huh?" I replied.

"You called me a hypocrite for enjoying Christian holidays, but here you are, the fervent hater of all things Christmas, at a Christmas dinner," he said with an amused sparkle in his eyes.

"This isn't a Christmas dinner," I grumbled, surprised he even remembered that conversation.

"Sure it is!" he replied. "We even started an hour early to exchange gifts!"

I opened my mouth in shock. Really? No! They didn't, they wouldn't, right?

"You didn't!" I gasped, and Jasper chuckled.

"No, we didn't, but it was priceless to see your face when I said that," he joked, and turned back around to the counter.

"I'll get you for that!" I said, scowling at his back.

"Will you now?" he asked in a light tone, but then his voice turned dark and a little husky. "Is that a promise, Edward?"

The sound and his words went straight to my already semi-hard cock, and I decided that very moment that I would do anything to get this man. Anything short of celebrating Christmas, that is! I took the five steps needed to reach him, and spun him around. With a barely audible 'Sorry', I cupped his face and crashed my lips to his.

He was rigid for a moment, but within seconds, I could feel him melt against me, and a drowned moan echoed through the kitchen. I grabbed his shoulders tighter and flicked my tongue over his lips, silently asking him to deepen the kiss.

He did, and as his taste registered in my brain, I bucked my hips against his in a frantic need to feel him even closer. His hands reached for my ass and grabbed onto my cheeks with lustful force. I forgot everything around me but him, our kiss and the burning smell that was now permeating my nose.

_Wait! Burning smell? _

I opened my eyes and pulled away from him just fast enough to see the last of the dish towel go up in flames. I stood, a bit shocked at that, but Jasper was fast on his feet, turning off the burning pit and stamping the smoldering flakes on the floor.

He looked up at me and grinned. "Well, that kiss was certainly highly flammable," he chuckled. "Now let's get these starters out, and I promise you can give me a hand with the main course later." I smirked and smacked his ass as he passed me with three plates balanced in his hands.

Four pairs of eyes watched us closely as we served the goose terrine and sat down. It tasted exquisite, and I moaned as the soft paté melted on my tongue. The man could cook! All the while I was glancing at him, trying to do it from the corner of my eye so it wouldn't be too obvious. I was horribly failing, because each time I looked at James, he smirked at me with a knowing glint in his eyes.

Once we were all finished, and Jasper had stacked the plates, Leah stood up. "I'll help you with that, Jasper," she said. Seth touched her arm, slightly shaking his head, but she wasn't having it. "What?" she asked her husband. "We can't have Jasper do all the work!"

I quickly got up from my seat and took the remaining two plates. "I'll do it," I said, a little too enthusiastically, and all my friends chuckled. I tried staring them down, but their happy smiles made it really hard to scold them. Instead I rushed after Jasper, who was already near the kitchen door.

As soon as I sat the plates down in the sink, he was on me. "Jesus, Edward! Did you _have_ to moan like that?" he growled in my ear before he bit my lobe. The moan at the table was nothing compared to the one I let out now, and I could feel myself getting harder by the second.

"Fuck!" Jasper exclaimed, and palmed my cock. It felt so fucking good, and I involuntarily bucked up against his hand. When his other hand opened the button on my jeans and disappeared under my waistband, I stopped him. His eyes stood confused and slightly hurt when he looked up at me, but for all that I wanted to happen right now, it shouldn't.

"Jazz, I really want you, you can feel that I do," I said as I pushed my groin back against his hand. "But I want so much more with you than a quick fuck, and I don't think that we should rush this if you want the same." I slightly pulled back as I felt the truth of my explanation enforce the strength of my decision.

"Rush?" Jasper asked me incredulously. "I don't know about you, but I've been holding back for an entire year!" His frustrated statement was loud, and I quickly eyed the door, hoping my friends wouldn't hear us and check in.

"Edward, I want the same, I want to date and see if we could even be remotely as great as we are in my imagination. But trust me, there's nothing rushed about this," he said and reached out the hand I wasn't holding, pulling down my zipper. He teased the head of my cock through my boxers, making me whimper at his touch.

Who was I even kidding? Like I was in any mind to stop this now he was so skillfully persuading me. I let go of his wrist to grab his hips and pull him closer. Damn, it felt good to have him touch me, to have him flush against me, to smell him, to have him moaning in my ear.

He kissed his way over my jaw and down my throat, making sure to suck the skin in the crook of my neck. I loved it, I loved him marking me. As my hands reached for the hem of his shirt, he pushed down my jeans and boxers. I needed to feel more of him, not caring about where or when. In this lustful haze, there was just him and me.

He grabbed my ass with one hand and my thigh with the other, and before I knew it, I was sitting on top of the kitchen counter. His eyes met mine, and I could see the fire of my own need reflected in his dilated pupils. With a forceful but short kiss, he lowered his head and pushed me backwards with his hand on my chest.

I leaned back and watched intently as his lush lips parted, and his tongue slipped out to lick my entire length. I groaned and reached to grab hold of something. My hands just found scattered pots and pans, and some fell to the floor in loud bangs. I seriously didn't care, especially when he grabbed hold of my cock and let his mouth inch down on it in a torturously slow move.

"Fuck!" I cried out. The sensations of his hot mouth on me was too much. Leaning heavily on one arm, I grabbed a handful of his hair with my free hand. I really tried to keep it still, as well as my hips, but the more he sucked and licked, the more I lost control over my body.

I felt the back of his throat constrict around the sensitive head of my dick, and it was all it took for my balls to tighten and the vastly built pressure to release itself. Without warning, I came deep inside his mouth. Pulse after pulse releasing shivers up my spine, my toes curled and my body convulsed as I rode out my orgasm.

When I was entirely spent and Jasper had milked the last drops of cum from me, he let go and stood up. I pulled him into a searing kiss, that quickly changed from a thank you to a promise. I pushed him back slightly, got off the counter and backed him up against the wall.

His cock was rock hard when I palmed it through his jeans, so I made quick work of the button and zipper. Pulling his jeans and briefs down, I licked my lips. His was the most gorgeous cock I'd ever seen, and a pearly white drop of pre-cum was already leaking from the swollen head. With my tongue, I lapped it up and let it spread in my mouth, tasting him.

Looking up into his blue eyes I took his length and wrapped my lips around it. I wanted to make him cum hard, like I had, and I had no intention of making this quick, so I let him go with a pop and licked a wet trail down to his balls. One by one, I took them into my mouth and gently sucked on them. I wetted my fingers and slid them between his cheeks as I ran my mouth back up to his thick, hard cock.

As soon as I pressed one slicked up finger into his tight hot ass, he took hold of one of the metal racks filled with kitchen supplies. The strength with which he grabbed it had the contents spilling over the floor with a loud clatter. He opened his eyes in shock, but his moans as I started to move my finger let me know he was beyond caring as well. With one hand on the rack and the other one reaching out to my hair, he threw his head back and gasped, as I took him into my mouth down to the base and swallowed.

"Jesus! Fuck!" I heard from behind me, and I immediately let go of Jasper and turned around. I tried to hide his exposed cock from James' scrutinizing stare, only to realize that my own jeans were still around my knees.

My cheeks flushed furiously as I quickly pulled them up, and I could hear Jasper doing the same behind me. "Uhm, yeah, sorry," I muttered at my best friend, who gave us a moment of privacy by turning around.

"Fuck your sorry! Edward, what were you thinking?" he yelled, though I had to chuckle when he added; "Are you decent now? I can't shout at you when I can't see your face!" in a much less angry tone.

"Yeah, you can turn around," Jasper said humorously.

James' face was distorted in anger when he turned back to face me. "You!" he yelled while pointing at me. "I told you to fucking leave him alone if this is all you were interested in! Here I thought that with you having an actual relationship last year that you've changed! But no, first chance you get alone with him you jump him like a fucking dog in heat!"

I glared at him angrily and opened my mouth to reply, but Jasper was faster. "James, you need to back off, man," he said, and moved in front of me. "It was actually me who did the jumping, and Edward telling me we shouldn't rush, and that he wanted more than a quick fuck. So don't go jumping to any conclusions."

James stared at us in turn, his eyes wide and unbelieving. And then he started laughing, almost doubling over while clutching his stomach.

"What the fuck is so funny?" I asked.

"Y-you... a-are!" he replied between breaths. "Fuck, Edward! Next thing, you'll be handing out Christmas presents!"

"Don't count on it," I grumbled.

"All right," James said, ignoring my comment. "Glad we got that sorted. Now, can I count on you finishing up dinner without any funny business?"

Jasper and I nodded, and I could see a faint blush covering his cheeks. It was adorable, and made him look even younger than he already did.

James left the kitchen with a warning glare in my direction, and I quickly made my way to the stove. Together we finished up and brought the main course to our friends, who were all grinning as we came in. The confrontation with James had effectively killed the lustful mood, but I couldn't help noticing that Jasper was still frustrated with not having gotten his release. I decided that I could make it so much worse before the evening was over, and I could drag him to my home and bed.

As the veal passed my lips, I moaned slightly at the taste, and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Great! So this was working. After I swallowed, I let my tongue graze my bottom lip like the taste was still there. Jasper whimpered slightly, soft enough to not be noticed by anyone other than me. By the time my plate was empty, there were tiny beads of sweat on his forehead, and I smirked to myself.

Leah had prepared a Tiramisu for dessert, and while she was in the kitchen to ready it for serving, I was making easy conversation with the others. Jasper wasn't paying any attention to us. Well, not to them anyway, I was fairly sure he had all his attention directed towards me. To be precise, his attention was directed towards the hand I had on his inner thigh, gently rubbing closer and closer to his cock.

He was trying to keep his eyes on whomever was talking, but I could see them being unfocused, clouded by want and need. I leaned my free elbow on the table and answered a question Vicky asked me about my work with a funny anecdote.

When Leah came back, I kept rubbing and ate one-handed. Jasper, on the other hand, was clutching his spoon for dear life, and more shoving his dessert around the plate than eating it. Obviously Leah, who was very eager to learn what the chef thought about her cooking, noticed.

"Jasper?" she asked in a timid voice. "That bad, huh?"

Jasper shot up straight and glanced at the poor woman. "W-what?" he stumbled, and quickly looked up into my eyes with a questioning look.

"The Tiramisu," Leah said. "You don't seem to be enjoying it all that much."

He cleared his throat and shifted in his seat and tried to push my hand away. I didn't relent, and moved my hand closer to his obvious erection. "No," he squeaked, probably both at me as well as Leah. "That's not it."

Leah cocked an eyebrow at him, and his face flushed, making me chuckle. I was very curious to find out how he would explain this one away. But instead of stumbling through an apology like I expected him to, he surprised me when he shot me an evil grin.

"I'm having trouble eating your wonderful dessert because of Edward," he said, and raised his voice a little when he continued; "He's had his hand rubbing me under the table for the past hour or so, and it's making it extremely hard to concentrate on anything else. So blame him if you wish, because I sure as hell will. And if you would excuse us, I'll have him take me home now, where I'll make sure he never _ever _tortures me like this _ever _again!"

I could feel the heat rise up to my ears as the entire table glared at me. _Fucking cheek!_ Yup, he had me/ Guess he decided that if _he _was going down, he'd be taking me with him. Truthfully, it was one of the things I really truly loved about him, and I smirked at him as I got up from my seat.

"Edward, don't forget!" James said to me, making me turn around to face him in confusion. "Anti-Christmas? The day after tomorrow?" he asked.

I glanced over my shoulder to an eagerly waiting Jasper, and grinned when I turned back to James. "Fuck, no," I answered him. "I think I have other plans."

I opened the door and let my other plans walk out before I quickly followed him. I unlocked my bicycle and winked at the gorgeous guy eyeing my means of transportation with doubtful suspicion.

"Well, hop on!" I smiled at him. "Your steed awaits!"

He sat down on the baggage carrier and wrapped his strong arms around my waist. "You know what?" he asked, and I slightly turned my head, indicating I was listening as I cycled us back to my place.

"At least now you have a reason to enjoy Christmas," he continued, ignoring my shaking head. "It'll be our anniversary."

I chuckled, panting a little as I had to paddle hard, cycling our combined weights uphill. "You know, I don't really do anniversaries!"

* * *

**I'd like it if you let me know what you think!**


	2. Avoiding Christmas 2012

_**My donation to the T4T Compilation! Enjoy everyone!**_

* * *

**December 17th, 2012**

I looked up from my morning paper as Edward strode into the kitchen with a stack of freshly delivered mail. He'd taken off his coat and scarf, but his hair still held tiny flecks of snow from walking our dog out in the wintery weather.

Said dog came rushing through the door as well, jumping up and down his leg in anxious anticipation of his breakfast. I just sighed and shook my head, the little cretin would soon turn into a bloated sausage, the way Edward kept feeding him.

However Spike was getting no response from the love of my life, who was adorably sporting an annoyed pout on his flushed face, scanning through the mail.

"Christmas card, Christmas card, invitation to the hospital's annual Christmas dinner, Christmas card, oh hey, a happy Chanukah, they know they're a day late, right? The bloody thing is already over! And surprise surprise, another Christmas card!" Edward said snidely as he threw the stack on the counter. "You know this is all your fault, right? Last year people wouldn't even mention the bloody holidays to me, and now that I'm all settled and happy, the ruddy cards come to take over my house!"

I couldn't hold in the smile that was tugging at my mouth, but managed to keep it small and barely noticeable. "They are hardly taking over _your_ house, love," I responded, turning a page and pretending to read about some new plans president Obama was considering on the other side of the world.

I could feel his eyes on me, glaring. My smile grew wider, completely inappropriately of course, which is why I was trying to hide it behind my cup of morning coffee.

"Stop smiling," he said in his driest possible tone. I couldn't help it, a tiny chuckle escaped my throat. "Stop it! This isn't funny!"

"You just can't appreciate the humor in it," I said smirking. "An entirely different thing."

Spike, still being ignored, started barking. Well, he would have started barking, if the sounds coming from his obnoxiously tiny body sounded anywhere near intimidating. I rubbed my forehead to keep the noise from bringing on a headache. "Ugh," I grunted. "We should've gotten a dog."

Edwards mouth opened into an insulted 'O'. "Spikey _is _a dog!"

I raised an eyebrow and looked down on what we so fittingly called a Jackuhuahua. The tiny cross between a Chihuahua and a Jack Russell was disgustingly cute and happy, as it kept on dancing around Edward's legs while keeping up its high pitched squealing. Its lungs were entirely disproportionate to its body and I was even wondering where the mongrel fit them.

There had to be some magic going on in there, some extension spell, like in Harry Potter. Maybe we should have called the little devil Tardis, bigger on the inside and all. That also worked for the vast amounts of food it devoured on a daily basis.

"_Spike_ is a rat, and a noisy rat at that," I responded without looking at Edward.

The moment I said the name out loud, the dog stopped dancing and turned its huge dark shiny eyes towards me. The little tapping noise its tiny nails made against the floor tiles was all that could be heard for a few seconds, as Spike made his way towards me.

I glanced at Edward who stood staring at me with wide eyes, and I felt little paws press against my thigh, the Jackuhuahua stood on its hind legs and leaned against me.

"But he's the most adorable rat I've ever seen," I said and I picked up the second love of my life. "Yes, you are! Adorable little puppy," I cooed and let the dog lick all over my face.

"That's disgusting," Edward said. "I ain't kissing you now!"

"You weren't kissing me anyway," I retorted. "_You_ are in grumpy Grinch mode. Isn't he Spike? Daddy's grumpy, yes he is, yes he is!"

"What are you, five?" Edward growled and turned to the coffee pot to pour himself a cup.

"Nah, that coffee is old, sit down and I'll make it fresh," I said, putting the dog down and standing up from the table. "Eggs, love?"

As I passed him, he swatted my ass and sat down on _his _side of the kitchen table. "You know exactly what I need," he said huskily. "My mother always told me I needed to marry a nice girl who could cook. Can't believe I'm at least _some_what following her advice."

My hands stilled on the carton of eggs. _Marry, marriage... _Fuck! Was he serious?

"But maybe there's some truth in that Ice queen's views after all," he went on. "I mean, I wouldn't be opposed to you cooking my meals for the rest of my life."

Jesus, he was, wasn't he? He was God damn stone cold serious.

"It wouldn't be completely one sided, of course," he followed. "You'ld have but to cough, and I'd be all over _you _with my amazing doctor skills, fix you back up to being healthy as a horse. You have to admit it's a..."

I heard him talking, but the words no longer came through. Marriage, fuck, would I ever want anything like that ever again? I'd been there and it didn't exactly turn out that well for me. I had never even imagined that someone like Edward, who was so vehemently against anniversaries and holidays, would ever want to get married. The possibility seriously never crossed my mind. What the fuck was I going to do?

"Jazz?" he said as his arms slid around my waist. "You okay? You kind of phased out there."

"Hmmm?" I responded. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'll just get the coffee started and fix you some eggs. Sunny side up?"

"I'm feeling adventurous today," he said with a grin. "Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm, scrambled. Yup, scrambled sounds just perfect!"

He clicked his ever present iPod in the stereo and put on some music while I measured the coffee and dumped it into the filter. Humming along with Air's 'La Femme D'argent' he pulled the paper towards him, completely oblivious to the feeling of panic raging through my body.

I took a frying pan from its hook on the ceiling and lit the burner underneath. While the pan heated up I quickly whisked some eggs in a bowl and chopped some mushrooms and tomatoes. Without really paying attention I shoved it all into the pan and started scrambling the baking eggs.

Fuck. Would he mind if I never wanted to get married again? I was just fine with our relationship the way it was. There's no need for actual vows and all that when you love each other, right? I mean, we could just get a contract or something, to make sure all our rights were covered. Domestic partnership, that didn't sound half as scary as getting married again. Would that be enough for him? Or would he really want to go through the marriage thing?

"Jasper! Where the hell is your mind at?" Edward yelled and I snapped out of my thoughts. The smell permeating the kitchen clearly told me I stopped scrambling the eggs a while ago, and they had been ready a while ago as well. Fuck!

"Sorry, I-," I said a bit dazed while Edward turned off the burner and took the pan from my hand. He took my spatula and placed it in the sink together with the pan.

I was still just staring a bit into nothing, realizing that I fucked up a batch of scrambled eggs, _eggs!_ I was a bloody chef for fuck's sake! _Eggs!_

He took both my hands in his and placed a kiss on my palms. "Babe, what's wrong?" he asked me.

I looked up and just started drowning in his amazing green eyes, that bright, perfect tourmaline color that never failed to capture me. "I-I don't know, I don't feel so well," I answered.

"What is it? A headache? Dizzy?" he questioned, looking slightly more concerned than a second earlier. "Have you already had your breakfast? Any nausea?"

"It's nothing," I quickly said. "Probably just some 24 hour bug, you can fuss over me if I don't feel better tomorrow. Let me make you some new eggs."

He kissed the tip of my nose and turned away. "Can't," he said. "It's okay, I'll pick something up from the baker on the way, but I really got to go if I want to make it for the department meeting."

He rolled up the paper and turned back to face me. "You done with this?" he asked and I gave a noncommittal nod.

"Thanks," he said and kissed my lips. "Love you!"

"Love you," I whispered as the back door closed behind him. Spike was running along the floor-reaching windows that looked out into the garden, watching Edward take his bike from the shed and maneuver it through the gate.

"Breakfast?" I asked the dog that was already making his way back to me, eyes wide and begging.

"Yeah, thought so," I murmured while taking a can of dog food from the fridge. As I scooped the food into Spike's bowl, the phone rang.

"Hang on!" I uselessly yelled at the phone while struggling with the spoon, can and bowl, to quickly get rid of it and answer. The result was of course twice the amount of food the dog should have on the floor and an empty bowl.

"Fuck!" I cursed just before I picked up. "Yes?"

"_Jasper, honey,"_ my mother asked. _"Is that you?"_

"Hey mom," I said. "Yeah, it's me. Sorry, I just had an accident with Spike's breakfast."

"_That's okay, sweetie," _she said. _"Have you asked Edward about Christmas?"_

I inwardly groaned. My mother had been asking me about Christmas dinner, hoping me and Edward would join the table. However, knowing Edward, I hadn't even dared to ask.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, mum," I lied. "He's got to work, and I'm going to hang around the hospital to get as much time together at Christmas as I can with him."

I felt horrible telling my mother this fabricated story. In truth, Edward avoided the hospital like the plague around Christmas, he only had two more days of work before we'd both be free for two weeks. Every single inch of Edward's workplace was covered in Christmas stuff, and it would be overrun by families celebrating the holidays there with the loved ones who were too sick to go home.

However, my mother couldn't understand his reluctance to celebrate. We'd had a horrible falling out three months ago, when my birthday was coming up. I'd tried to explain that I wasn't celebrating it, but she insisted I came around their house for an impromptu birthday bash. I'd snuck out while Edward was at work, not even telling him it _was _my birthday. I wasn't going to jeopardise the best thing that ever happened to me. If I had to make some simple concessions to keep him happy, I would. Celebrations of annual events were just a few of them, no biggie.

"_He works way too hard!" _my mother said. _"Well, even if you can't come for Christmas, do you have any idea what kind of present we could get him?"_

"He doesn't really want anything, mum," I said, knowing I was falling on deaf ears.

"_Well, I know you two just get anything you want with your combined salaries," _she said cheerily. _"But there's gotta be something he wants that you don't already have."_

"It's not that, mum," I tried to explain. "You know Edward doesn't believe in holiday gifts. Please don't get him anything, it'll only make him uncomfortable."

"_Nonsense," _my mother said. _"The boy just needs some positive holiday cheer!"_

"Mum," I pleaded. "Please?"

I could practically hear her roll her eyes. _"All right, you know what?" _she said. _"I'll just get you something you both could use."_

"Fine," I said. "I'll come around a few days after Christmas, okay?"

"_Sure, honey," _she answered. _"Give my love to Edward, and enjoy your Christmas together!"_

"Love you, mum!" I answered and hung up with a sigh.

I turned the stereo to 'Sky Radio' and hummed along with the Christmas carols while I cleaned away the ruined breakfast. When the kitchen was spotless once again, I poured myself a fresh cup of coffee and scanned through the Christmas cards on the counter. Truthfully, I loved them, and secretly, I'd hung up a red ribbon in my kitchen pantry to hang them on. The only place in the house, where Edward never went.

.

**December 20th, 2012**

I slouched down on a barstool and hung my head in my hands. Great fucking day, and I couldn't even go home to Edward to complain about it. In exchange for him being free every Christmas, he had to pull more double and late shifts at the hospital the weeks prior. So instead of sitting on the couch with my man's arms around me, I was looking up hopefully at James while the bar's loud music attacked my wounded soul.

"What the on earth has dragged you through the fiery pits of hell?" James asked as he handed me a Jupiler.

"Aro," I answered, and luckily for me, that was all James needed to understand.

"Fucking asshole!" he spat and signaled for one of his employees to take over the bar. "You should just ignore the bastard."

I chuckled humorlessly. "I wish I could, James," I said. "But when he walks into L'Orangerie with one or two of his barely 18 year old twinks, there's not much I can do."

"You can stick to the kitchen and poison their food," James replied.

"You know he enjoys watching me squirm," I mumbled. "This is the third time since Edward punched him last October, that he came in. First he spends the night turning perfectly good food back to my kitchen, then he calls me over to the table to 'compliment the chef'. He just can't get over himself! The fucker had the audacity to talk about our sexlife in the middle of the fucking restaurant."

James's eyes flashed with fury and he opened his mouth to speak.

"Leave it, James," I said. "He was a manipulative sick fucker when we were married, I doubt there's anything you can do to make him stop now."

"I realize that," he said. "But I can't believe John wouldn't chuck him out of his restaurant."

I easily jumped to my boss's defence. "Aro spends a fortune there," I explained. "As long as he isn't sexually harassing me, I'm not going to complain. You _know_ what the economic climate is like right now, John can use all the customers he can get."

"You mean you haven't even told him Aro's... Well, being Aro?" he asked me wide eyed.

"No," I replied and quickly added. "And you aren't going to either!"

"Alright," James promised. "But you know this isn't going to stop. He wants you back, and he's willing to do anything to make that happen."

"You're almost right," I said after a large swig from my bottle.

"Care to tell me where I'm wrong?" James replied, looking at me with one of those strong eyebrows way up to his hairline.

"Are doesn't want me back," I told him blandly. When he started to protest, I explained. "Aro is a possessive motherfucker, but he's also a proud one. He wouldn't touch me with a stick after I left him and humiliated him with a divorce, but he still sees me as his. And he doesn't like seeing what is his with another man."

"You think he's really that sick?" James asked with a horrified look on his face.

"He likes to fuck boys that either are, or look too young to have pubic hair. Are you seriously questioning how sick the man is?" I growled while shaking my head.

I still couldn't believe I ever fell for the man. Yeah, I'd been young and naive, actually I'd been _very _young and _very _naive, but still. I should've realized it wasn't healthy for a 30 year old to start a relationship with a boy just over half his age.

My parents were horrified when they heard about it, wanting to report him to the police straight away. Unfortunately that was one more difference between the Netherlands and the USA. No such thing as statutory rape. A kid can have sex when they turn 16, and it doesn't matter how old their partner is. I was 17, so as far as the law was concerned, nothing untoward was happening.

Still they pleaded for me to break it up. They grounded me, had me coming home straight after school, forbade me from going out at the weekends. They were furiously hoping that cutting our time together short would make Aro lose interest. But he just took it as a challenge, and I'd been too caught up in the attention and the gifts he'd showered me with, thinking myself in love. Love. I didn't think I would've ever known what love felt like if I hadn't met Edward.

He was my second chance, and I'd be damned if I let anything or anyone ruin what I had with him. Aro could just go to hell with his vindictive shit, he couldn't touch us. I'd make sure of that.

"Yeah, you're right," James said softly. "Still, you should tell John. I'm sure he'd rather lose the extra profit, than lose his chef."

"I'm sure he would," I answered. "Though he's not losing me. Aro annoys the hell out of me, but I'm not going to let him get to me."

"There's my Jasper," James chuckled. "Maybe he'll just lose interest when you don't respond to his taunts."

I answered his chuckle noncommittally. "Yeah, and maybe Edward will dress up as Santa and celebrate Christmas this year."

At that James choked up into a fit of laughter. "Point taken!" he said and returned to the bar. "Another beer?"

"Nah," I answered. "I'm dead on my feet, better head home before I pass out in the corner."

"Sure thing," he said while I put on my coat. "Give my love to Edward?"

"Will do," I called over my shoulder and walked back into the cold December night.

.

Once home, I crawled under the duvet straight away. Still I couldn't seem to catch any sleep. The bed was cold and empty without Edward, and nothing but his arms around me could truly calm me down from the panic that was building inside me. Everything was so fucking perfect. I had a man I loved, a house to call home, a cute little mongrel to call my baby, and a life ahead of me. Still, dark clouds were moving in, hellbent on destroying my happiness.

After tossing and turning for what felt like hours, I got back out of bed and put on a robe. Tiny nails clicking against stone tile betrayed the fact that Spike heard me coming down the stairs. I picked him up and carried him to the living room, where we curled up in an armchair together. Somehow he was a soothing balm to my worried heart.

"You know, Spike?" I whispered. "It doesn't matter if we made mistakes, or if we're not perfect. It'll all be alright in the end. Just you wait and see."

Spike looked up at me with his huge dark clueless eyes and stared at me for a second. Then his tiny tongue reached out and licked my face in a hurried frenzy. "Yeah, I love you too, you dolt."

.

A soft kiss on my brow pulled me from my sleep, warm breath dusting my eyelids, his soft voice calling my name. "Jasper, love," Edward whispered. "Wake up and come to bed."

"Hmmmm," I moaned, pulling Spike's snoring body closer to my chest. "S'good here."

Edward ran his nose over my forehead, down my temple to the soft spot underneath my ear and kissed the side of my neck. I shivered. "Are you sure?" he teased. "It will be awfully good if you come with me."

"Hmmmm," I moaned again. "M'kay."

He lifted Spike from my arms and pulled me from the chair. With a firm, but gentle grip, he led me through the dark room, up the stairs and into our bedroom. Only there did he put the dog down on the foot of the bed. The fucker. We'd had this discussion time and time again. Dogs don't belong on beds. I was just too tired to complain and let myself fall back against the mattress when Edward pulled back the duvet.

"Love you," I murmured when his warm body snuggled in behind me, spooning me from shoulders to toes.

He pressed a kiss between my shoulderblades and ran his hand through my hair. "I love you too, Jazz, more than anything."

**December 23rd, 2012**

"Fuck!" I cried out once I reached my kitchen. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

The dishwasher glanced at me with a worried expression, while my five line cooks kept their heads down and focussed on their dishes. I wasn't the worst boss in the business, but lately I felt tense and it was hard to not take it out on them.

I slammed my fists down on the work table simultaneously, once again crying out a frustrated 'Fuck!'.

That asshole. That fucking, possessive, stupid, inconceivably vile bastard. I'd had enough. I was so far past 'enough' that I couldn't even see that line. Of all the things he could do, all the harassment, the demeaning comments and showing up at my job, he'd gone too far this time.

I had to go, I had to see and explain to Edward that this was _not _what it looked like, or what Aro claimed it was. Only I couldn't, not for another hour or three. What if it reached him before I had a chance to talk to him? What if he actually believed it? What if he thought I'd cheated on him? I couldn't lose him, not like that, not ever!

My Sous was on vacation, the only reason why I was working tonight at all. Being the executive Chef of a restaurant like this meant I couldn't just walk out and let my Line Cooks fend for themselves. I was stuck. Stuck hoping that no one thought it a good idea to let Edward know what was currently circulating through the entire catering sector of Tilburg. Stuck hoping that if someone did, he'd at least trust me enough to not believe it.

"Fuck!" I shouted while kicking one of the work table's legs.

"Chef?" asked Carola, one of my Cooks. "Are you alright?"

I chuckled humorlessly. No, of course I wasn't fucking alright! Wasn't that blatantly obvious? "Just worry about your steaks, and I'll worry about myself," I snapped. She immediately turned back to her station, a blush clear on her cheeks. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for, Carola," I called after her. She shrugged.

"No, I mean it. I owe all of you an apology. I haven't exactly been... pleasant. Everything's a little fucked up right now, but I shouldn't be taking it out on you guys." I said a little louder.

Bart, another of my Cooks turned to face me with a smirk. "Can't say I'm that bothered, Chef," he said. "Even with your recent personality switch, we're still damn lucky to be working with you."

Not knowing how to respond to the compliment, I waved it away and turned to hide the light blush I could feel spreading over my face. "Yes, well, flattery will get you nowhere," I muttered. "Are tables 5, 9 and 13 ready to be served?"

Carola tensed as Marijn shook his head in denial. "No? Then stop yapping and get moving!" I yelled playfully.

"Yes, Chef!" my Cooks cried out in sync.

I rubbed my forehead while steadying myself against the work table. I didn't have a clue how I was going to get through the next couple of hours. I could feel a headache starting to build behind my eyelids, a low thumping against my temples as I feared Edward's reaction.

.

I sighed in relief when kitchen closing came around. One of the busiest nights of the year, and Aro knew it. That was probably why he'd chosen today to make his move. A move that had the very potential to ruin everything I came to depend upon to keep my sanity in one go. My Cooks were laughing and joking together while they went about cleaning the kitchen.

"I have to go early," I said. "I want this kitchen as clean as a whistle. I don't need to tell you what happens if I come back here after the holidays and find it anything but spotless, do I?"

"No, Chef!" three of them called out, while Jan, the dishwasher came over and held out his hand.

"Happy Christmas, Chef," he said and winked. What the?

"Happy Christmas, Jan," I answered. "All of you, actually!"

"Happy Christmas, Chef," they all said and I left the kitchen in search of John.

"Jasper," he said when I walked into his office. "You off already?"

"Yeah," I answered. "I kind of have to head home as soon as possible."

He leaned back in his chair and stared, scrutinizing me. Picking up his phone he seemed to be hesitating over something.

"Might this have anything to do with it?" he asked, and I looked down at the tiny video playing on the screen of his phone. I felt sick to my stomach. I'd seen the same video on my own phone earlier, and I knew it had been sent to a lot of people, but this was bad. John had it. My _boss_ had a video of me sucking off my ex. A video Aro made when I was still married to him, but one he claimed was only a month old.

"Please turn that off," I said in a broken voice. He did, but he kept staring at me.

"Look, Jasper," he started and I knew he was going to fire me. Stuff like that was bad for the restaurant. I might be a good Chef, a great Chef according to a lot of people, but a bad reputation was something that could ruin a place like this.

However, John surprised me when he continued. "I know he has been coming in here. Has he been bothering you?"

I looked away, not knowing how to answer.

"Has he?" John pushed and I nodded in response. "Why the hell didn't you tell me?"

I shrugged, what could I say?

"Jasper, you're like a son to me, you know that right?" he said quietly. "I'll tell the waiters to refuse him next time he comes in."

I threw up my hands. "No, John. This is your place, _your _living! You can't just refuse everyone who's an ass!"

"I can, and I will," he replied sharply. "You've been a mess for the past few weeks, everyone can see it!"

"I can handle it," I bit back.

"Great way of handling it," he replied. "Don't worry about it so much, I can do without a customer like that. Now go home to your Edward and enjoy the holidays."

"But-," I started.

"No buts," John cut me off. "Go. and don't forget this!"

He threw me a heavy enveloppe, heavier than I had thought it would be. I had to fight my curiosity to not look inside that very moment, after all, it wasn't very good manners to count your Christmas bonus with your boss in the room.

"Thanks, John," I said, attempting a smile. "Happy Christmas."

"Happy Christmas, Jasper," he said. "Now shoo!"

.

Edward was on the couch when I got home, his head turning when I closed the front door.

"Hey, Jazz," he said, struggling to keep Spike in his lap.

"Hey, babe," I replied and leaned in for a kiss. He was tense, I could feel it. Dread immediately filled me and I pulled back to look into his beautiful eyes.

"Busy night?" he asked in a weird tone, further worrying me.

"Yeah, it was," I answered, clueless as to what else to say.

"There's-," Edward said and stopped, taking a deep breath with closed eyes before looking back up at me. "Sit down, you're not going to like this."

My butt immediately dropped down to the coffee table, sweat covering my palms. My breath hitched when he took one of my hands between his and rubbed his thumbs over it. I didn't think he was trying to hurt me, but his grip was too tight and the rubbing too rough. I winced slightly and tried to pull back my hand, but he wouldn't let go.

"It's Aro, he-," he paused and took another breath. "He did something, sent something to a lot of people."

I worried my bottom lip between my teeth, knowing exactly what Edward was talking about, but not knowing where he was going with this.

"It's a video, I think he made it when you were still together, but he sent it to James and when he couldn't reach you on your phone, he called me," Edward said. I let out a relieved breath at the notion that Edward didn't think I cheated on him.

"I know," I whispered. "He sent it to me as well."

Edward squeezed my hand a little tighter, his eyebrows furrowing into an angry glare. "There's more," he said. "He showed up here, saying that you'd been cheating on me with him and I almost killed him."

"What?" I asked horrified. What did that mean, almost killed him? Did he beat the crap out of Aro? Please, God, no! I didn't give a fuck if Aro got hurt, but Edward could lose his job, his career, even his freedom if Aro pressed charges. And he would!

When Edward hit Aro back in October, it was my ex who had thrown the first punch. The fucker came up to us in the street and tried to put his hands on me. When Edward stopped him by pushing him back, Aro's fist connected with Edward's jaw and before I could even open my mouth to cry out, my man had hit him so hard that Aro went down. My ex had tried to get Edward arrested for assault, but he was equally if not more guilty.

"I didn't do anything," Edward said. "I just slammed the door in his face and locked it for good measure. Though I did kill some of your china, I'm sorry."

This had to stop. What else would Aro be willing do to get what he wanted?

I pulled back my hand and stood up. "This will end tonight! I'm done, completely truly done with his pathetic attempts to terrorize us."

Edward stood up as well, grabbing my arm as I stalked to the door. "What are you planning to do?" he asked, his eyes wide and worrisome.

"I'm going to tell him to fuck off!" I grunted under my breath, too angry to speak clearly.

Edward laughed defeatedly. "Like that's going to help," he said.

"It's one thing I've never tried," I answered. "While I was with him, I just rolled over and took it. Yeah, I asked for the divorce, but I did so through my lawyer. All I do now, is try and ignore him as much as I can, letting you and John stand up for me. But that's in the past now. I'm not going to act like a scared little boy any longer. I'm a grown fucking man, and he's got nothing on me. Nothing!"

"Fuck!" Edward groaned.

"What?" I snapped, looking him in the eyes and seeing the darkness taking over.

"You're fuck hot when you're angry like this," he said and leaned in to kiss me. I wanted him to, I truly did, but now was really not a good time. I gently pushed him back and shot him an evil smile.

"Don't distract me right now!" I said angrily, making Edward chuckle.

"I'll drive," he said and reached for the keys I'd already picked up.

.

Edward agreed to stay by the elevators when we reached the floor of the apartment I used to share with Aro. He did so reluctantly, but he understood that this was something I had to do by myself.

I pounded on the door more than knocked, but I couldn't really care less. It took but a minute for the man to open the door and look down at me. Shock covered his handsome features for a fraction of a second, before he quickly composed himself.

"Jasper," he said with a smirk. "What a pleasant surprise. Come in, come in!"

I grabbed his shirt with two hands and shoved him up against the doorframe. He took hold of my wrists, but couldn't get me to let go.

"I've had it with you, you fucking asshole!" I yelled. "Do not _ever _come near me again, you hear me? No phone calls, no coming to the restaurant, no fucking videos, nothing! I don't want you looking at me, touching me, or even thinking about me. Are we clear?"

"Now, now," he said, clearly shaken, but still controlled. "There's no need to be so dramatic."

"Aro?" a young voice called from inside, followed by a pretty face that belonged to a boy no older than I had been when me and Aro got together.

"If you're smart, you get the hell out of here and forget this asshole ever existed," I snapped at the boy who looked at us wide eyed.

"Robert, go back inside," Aro purred. "I'll be right in."

"I'm serious," I said, ignoring my ex's words. "I made the mistake of marrying this son of a bitch. Get away from him and find someone your own age, who will actually love you for you, instead of your tight ass."

The boy just stood there, not sure of what to do.

"Robert," Aro snarled. "I said 'get your fucking ass inside'!"

The boy's eyes widened and he disappeared back into the living room. I sighed, knowing that I couldn't save every young boy from this man. At least I tried.

Before I could open my mouth again to throw a last warning in Aro's direction, the boy appeared again, wearing a jacket. He looked up at my ex as he slid past us and murmured something unidentifiable before he crossed the hall to the stairs.

"You happy now?" Aro snapped. "You're fucking useless, nothing more than a piece of ass. I can't believe I actually married you!"

I let go of him a little, but pushed him right back once I noticed. "Likewise," I hissed. "Now stay the hell away from me and Edward! Forget I even exist, understood?"

"Gladly," he bit back.

I let go and walked away. I didn't know for sure if he would leave us in peace now, but I knew one thing. Aro liked preying on the weak, and I'd just shown him that I was no longer the spineless impressionable boy that I used to be. I felt good.

Yes, there was still the video, and I was horrified to think of all the people that would've seen it, but that would pass. People would forget about it eventually. What was important, was that Edward loved me, that I loved him, and that we were still together.

**December 26th, 2012**

I was dreaming, and it was a really good dream. I was dreaming that my sexy Edward kissed me, my mouth, my jaw, my neck, going further down. His teeth worried my nipples and I breathed out his name. He lingered there for a while, my arousal growing by the second. I was arching my back, grabbing his hair to pull him impossibly closer. God, I loved it when Edward kissed me like this.

His lithe fingers preceded his mouth down my stomach, his tongue dipping into my navel, making me squirm and breath out heavily. His touch was always like ice and fire on my skin at the same time. Arousing, flirting, teasing and giving me all that I needed.

He slid down my boxers, the only item of clothing I wore in bed and pulled them off. His hands caressing the skin of my thighs and legs as the fabric slid down, was both pleasurable as tantalizing. I was always so sensitive when aroused.

His breath ghosted over my hard cock and balls, so close, but not close enough. "Please," I moaned, my hips bucking up to feel his talented mouth on my needy erection. "Please," I repeated, and reached out to run my hands through his hair.

He never made me wait long. I gasped as his hot wet lips slid from the base of my cock to the head, his tongue coming out to play and drive me insane. Edward took my balls in his hand and gently tugged, making my breath hitch. He took that moment to take my shaft into his mouth, not closing his lips around it, his breath still teasing the hot skin.

Then, finally, did he close his lips around my cock, letting it slide in and out of his mouth in a sensually slow rhythm. It felt so good, so, so good. I don't know if it was my dream state, his skill or the love I felt for my man, but I honestly couldn't imagine a feeling that was better than this. Well, maybe the feeling of having him inside me, or being inside him. The feeling of knowing we belonged together while looking in each other eyes while one of us rode the other to climax.

The rhythm never sped up, as he let my cock go with a pop and slid back up my body. "Open your eyes, Jasper," he whispered into my ear, his hand languidly taking over the erotic slide of his mouth where I wanted it most.

"Wake up, babe," he breathed. "In a minute or two, I'm going to fuck you deeply, and I'd rather you be awake for that."

"Hmmmmm," I moaned in response, making him chuckle. I fluttered my eyelids, trying to open them, but the light that poured through the gap in the curtains was assaulting my eyes.

"So good," I said softly before moaning some more. "Edward!"

His hand let go of my cock and reached further down, between my thighs. His finger grazing my hole as I pulled up my legs to give him better access. It was wet with saliva, teasing the puckered skin before gently pushing inside. I never needed much preparation, and soon he shifted next to me, reaching out for the lube.

I groaned when his finger left me, but sighed in relief when he settled between my legs and pressed his now lubed and condom covered cock against my ass.

I didn't particularly love the first few seconds of penetration, though he knew exactly how to enter me after a year of amazing sex. Slowly, with gentle thrusts, he pushed his cock inside, giving me time to adjust to the full feeling.

I looked into his eyes and gave a nod when I was ready. He slowly started pulling out and pushing back in, a steady rhythm that had tingles shooting up and down my spine.

Sliding my fingers through his hair, I lifted my head and caught his mouth into a sensual kiss. I loved kissing him like this, his warm body pressing into mine, my cock rubbing between our stomachs. So, so good!

His hand held onto my thigh, while his other kept up his weight, to not entirely rest on me. My hands, however, were free to roam his skin. I lightly scratched his back exactly the way he liked it. It wasn't like he was into pain play, but he liked a little roughness. Whenever it was me fucking him, we'd be going at it like animals, though at times like this, we'd be taking our time. Deep and strong, but never wild.

He explained it to me once, that while I needed him to take care of me, he loved being used for both our pleasure. At the same time he needed to care for me, while I loved fucking him hard, feeling powerful and in control. He loved both my strong and vulnerable sides, as I loved his. Perfect synchrony.

I could see his need in his eyes, his thrusts becoming stronger and deeper. We were building towards the inevitable orgasm that I wanted to postpone as long as I could. Both our breathing heavy and laboured, our bodies sweaty, our heartbeats fast and pulsing.

"Jazz," he groaned, his voice deep and throaty. "God, I love you!"

I couldn't speak, instead I kissed him again, battling his tongue while he hit my prostate over and over. My cock was still rubbing deliciously between us, but it wasn't enough. "Please," I begged. He knew exactly what I was begging for.

He lifted himself us a little further and the hand on my thigh moved to my throbbing shaft. Stroking, squeezing, his thumb flicking over the the head that was now purple and oozing with need. My climax built within seconds and with another thrust deep inside me, I came all over his hand.

He duck down and licked my nipple while I rode it out, clenching around him still thrusting deep inside me. He stilled, thrusting one more time and let go with a grunt. I held onto him tightly while I could feel the pulse of his aftershock course through his cock.

"Love waking up like this," I whispered.

His body shook as he chuckled. "Love waking you up like this," he replied and kissed me again.

Life couldn't get any better than this, honestly.

.

After a shower and breakfast, we settled on the couch with our books, just quietly enjoying each other's company. My head lay in his lap, his hands running absentmindedly through my hair, while I was stroking Spike, who was curled up on my stomach. What a picture we would make, were someone to snap one now. I never once believed that I could enjoy something so homely. Well, I knew I would enjoy it, I just never thought I'd have it. Edward seemed to love it as well, for he always snuggled up against me, or pulled me to snuggle up against him. How something so perfect could be real, I might never find out, though I truly hoped it would last forever.

I was at danger of falling asleep when my phone rang, but before I could move, Edward had picked it up.

"Hey, Mrs Hale," he said and I froze. "No, you're not interrupting anything. We're just relaxing on the couch. Did you want to talk to Jasper?"

I tried to hear what my mother was saying, but I could just hear her voice, not the actual words.

"No, I've been free since Friday," he said, turning his head to look at me with furrowed eyebrows. "I'm always free this time of year."

The silence stretched on for a little longer. "Oh really?" he said surprised. "No, that's news to me."

I closed my eyes. Fuck! I knew there was a chance that I would get caught, but I really didn't think it would come out this soon, nor did I think that it would come out like this. There was no interference I could run to make it less obvious that I'd been hiding my parents' dinner invitation from my lover.

Christmas hadn't been what I had loved in the past, but it had been good anyway. On Christmas eve we'd made love in front of the fireplace, Spike carefully locked in the kitchen, and it was the perfect anniversary without calling it an actual anniversary.

Yesterday had been wonderful. We went to the park with Spike and made love again when we got home. The rest of the day and night was spent reading, cuddling and playing Mahjong, a game we both enjoyed.

Today had had all the probability to be perfect again, but my mother's phone call was sure to have ruined it. I reluctantly got up and put Spike on the floor. With a guilty look on my face, I made my way to the kitchen pantry. My pantry, the one place that was truly mine. I closed the door behind me and sat down on the steps that lead down to the dark and cool room. With my head in my hands I wondered how on earth I was going to apologize to my parents, and how I was going to explain this to Edward.

I could still just hear his voice, as the conversation went on and on. I didn't have a clue what they were talking about, but I could guess. They were probably raving about me being a lying bastard, and I was. Both my parents and Edward hated to be lied to, I knew that, and I did it anyway. I royally fucked it up this time, hadn't I?

I sat there for what felt like an hour before the door opened and light shone into my safe haven.

"Jasper?" he said softly, his hand coming down to rest on my head. "Would you care to explain to me why your mother thought we'd be at the hospital?"

"I'm sorry," I said in a small voice, doing all I could to stop myself from sobbing like a child. "I told them you had to work, I just didn't know how to-"

My voice broke and I stopped speaking. Edward squatted down behind me, just outside the pantry door, and ran his hand down my neck to the hollow between my shoulder blades.

"You didn't know how to bring up Christmas dinner at your parents' place," he said softly, sounding almost defeated. "I'm sorry, Jasper."

I snapped my head around so fast it hurt. "_You're _sorry?" I asked completely shocked. "What on earth are _you _sorry for?"

"I haven't exactly made it easy for you, have I?" he said while looking at the kitchen floor. "I haven't done anything but grunt at everything concerning the holidays, and I haven't once asked you how _you _wanted to spend it."

"Like this!" I cried out, turning the rest of my body to make it easier to face him. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere but here! I love you, Edward, and if being with you means not celebrating Christmas, then I don't _want _to celebrate Christmas!"

I was trying to make him feel better, but I was horribly failing, for every word seemed to slap him in the face.

"God!" he sighed. "I really fucked up, didn't I?" He ran his fingers through his thick hair and closed his eyes before snapping them open and looking straight at me.

"Jasper, I truly don't like Christmas, and I've been avoiding it for years now, but I should've realised you haven't," he said. "The first night I met you, you explicitly told me you liked it. I shouldn't have been so incredibly dense and selfish."

"It's okay," I said quickly. "It really is! I don't care! I love you, and I'd gladly give up Christmas for you!"

"Yeah, that's painfully clear," he replied, looking even more resigned. "The thing is, you shouldn't have to. My grumpy Grinch mode was fine when I was still single, but it isn't any more. A relationship is about giving as much as taking, and I've taken too much from you."

"You've given me a lot more!" I cried out, frantically searching for anything to ease his mind.

"You've given things up for me, Jasper. I've merely given you whatever didn't hurt to give. I'm not used to celebrations and important dates, because I never cared about them, but you do," he said. "What I'm trying to say is that I don't mind having Christmas dinner with your parents, and I don't mind taking you out on Valentine's day. I might not want to celebrate any holidays, however I _do _want to celebrate you. I... Fuck!"

He stood up and turned away from me, his hand once again in his hair, but this time pulling at it. "I forgot your birthday," he stated softly. "We've been together for a year, and I never even realized. God, I don't even know when your birthday _is!_ I'm a selfish fucking bastard! How could you even put up with me like this?"

"I love you," I said and stood up myself. I turned him to face me and kissed him. "You're not selfish, and I really don't mind. I'd choose you over any freaking holiday, _every _time."

He threw up his hands in frustration. "You shouldn't _have _to choose!" he cried out before cupping my face in his hands. He stared into my eyes and his face turned serious. "I promise I'm going to make this up to you, love. You don't ever have to worry about asking me to celebrate anything with you. I might not have shown it very often, if ever, but I _do _know how to compromise."

"I don't want you to compromise on your beliefs," I said.

"What I hate about Christmas, is not the holiday itself," he said softly. "Even though I think the entire thing is bullshit, I wouldn't hate it so much if it was just that. What I hate about it, is that everyone is supposed to be happy and forgiving. It sometimes feels like it's the only time of year when people are nice to each other. People should _always _be nice to each other. You don't give someone a gift because it's Christmas, you give someone a gift because you saw something you thought would brighten up their day, because you care about them. A gift freely given is a thousand times better than a gift that was forced."

"Like the necklace," I said, touching the tourmaline and sodalite necklace I'd given him for his birthday a little over a year ago.

"Like the necklace," he replied. "And like the smile you give me each morning. That's the best gift there is, Jasper. The best gift anyone ever gave me."

"My smile?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah," he answered. "My parents only ever gave me fake smiles. Smiles of content or smile that hid annoyance. Smiles that were forced on them in the spirit of Christmas."

"Oh," I breathed. It hit me then, right there, in that moment, why Edward hated Christmas.

"You're allowed to be sad or grumpy during Christmas at my parents' house," I said with a hesitant smile. "Though my mother will try her hardest to cheer you up, because she can't stand seeing anyone unhappy, no matter what time of year."

Edward chuckled. "I'm sure she would," he said. "She's a force to be reckoned with."

Running his fingers down my cheek he smiled down at me. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Jasper," he said and I froze. "That's not going to happen if we can't tell each other what we want or need."

"I don't want to get married!" I blurted out. Edward looked confused and raised an eyebrow questioningly.

"I wasn't asking right now," he replied.

"I know," I said. "But I don't want you to ask. I know you want to get married or something in the future, but it scares the shit out of me, to be honest."

"Babe," he said softly. "Whatever made you think I'm dead set on getting married?"

"You were talking about it last week, how your mother said you should marry a girl who could cook and that you were at least partially doing what she suggested," I explained, looking intently at the buttons of his shirt.

He lifted my chin and kissed my jaw before resting his forehead against mine. "I would get married to you, if that was what you wanted. I'd love to be married to you, but I want to be with you more than I want to be married. It's not that important to me," he said, reassuring me. "I would understand if you never wanted to do that again, love, I truly would. I _do_ want to ask you to consider it again in the future. A few years down the line."

I nodded in reply, finally feeling like I could breathe again.

He kissed the top of my head and searched my eyes again. "Will you promise to just tell me whatever you want? I won't say you'll always have your way, but at least let me decide what concessions I'm willing to make. I won't leave you for wanting different things than me, Jasper, you _do _know that, right?"

"I do now," I said sheepishly. "And I promise."

**January 4th, 2012.**

"Marijn! Tables 4 and 10 are still waiting on their starters!" I shouted at my Line Cook. "They're not going to prepare themselves!"

"Yes, Chef!" she called back to me as I turned around to check on the three soufflés that were almost finished in the oven.

"Bart, Soufflés in two!" I called.

"Yes, Chef!" he called back. How I loved my job. To be in the middle of the Friday night dinner rush!

"Jasper!" my Sous Chef called. I turned around, surprised to see Jenny at all. She was supposed to be on vacation until next week.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked her while making my way around the work table.

"Your Edward called me to take over," she said. "He needs you at home for something."

"Oh, ehm, alright," I replied, getting a little worried. "I've got three tables up on starters, there's nine that are already on their main courses and there's another eight tables that should come through any second now."

"Go!" she said with a smile. "Carola can bring me up to speed."

With another look around the kitchen I removed my Chef jacket and got my coat out of the closet behind the dishwasher's station. "Well, see you on Tuesday, I guess."

They were all too busy to actually say anything back, and honestly, I just wanted to get home as soon as possible. I wasn't sure what Edward needed me for, but he'd never pulled me out of work before.

I got my car from the car park and rushed home, nearly running a couple of red lights. Once I parked in front of our house, I all but ran to the front door and fumbled with my key in a hurry to get inside.

"Edward?" I called, my voice more panicked than I wanted it to be. The house was completely dark, which was weird as we even left the lights on when we went out in the evening.

Suddenly I jumped as the lights went on and people came jumping from the kitchen and living room doors. "Surprise!" they all yelled. Victoria, James, Seth, Leah, my parents, James's parents, little Joëlle, a few of Edward's colleagues and some of the employees of Extase I knew. What were they all doing here?

"What's going on?" I stammered, pulling off my coat and putting my keys on the little side table next to the door.

Leah and Seth moved to let someone through and I couldn't believe my eyes.

Edward came into the hallway in a bright red Santa suit, complete with white beard and belly stuffing. In his hands was a huge cake with candles that had 'Happy Birthday Jasper' written on it in bright colors. A string was tied around his wrist, attached to a shiny red balloon in the shape of a heart hovering above his head.

He was sporting a huge grin as he walked towards me and kissed my lips. "Happy Valentine's day, happy Birthday and a very happy Christmas, my love." he said, holding out the cake for me to blow the candles.

"You're mental," I laughed before inhaling deeply and blowing all the candles at once. God, I loved this man.

"Yup!" he said. "But this was long due, babe. I'm sorry I didn't do this before, on the dates these celebrations are supposed to be celebrated."

"You're mental," I said again, and reached up for another kiss.


End file.
